Some Calvinism Satire

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Ah, yes, praise God for hell-bound vipers!

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In a recent Reddit Reformed post, a Calvinist celebrates the birth and dedication of another wretched, depraved, hell-bound viper-in-a-diaper wonderful little innocent baby ! Of course, I myself believe that babies are wonderful little innocent blessings from God, and so I celebrate the birth of all babies and congratulate parents on baby dedications. But I can... because I'm not a Calvinist. Calvinists, however, hmm?  I know they truly love their children and praise God for them, feeling like they are (I hope) blessings and sweet little bundles of joy.   But I wonder if Calvinist parents have ever read these quotes of Calvinists' own views and teachings about babies and young children.  (I've already shared many of these before, but a bunch are new.) Because if they did, then maybe they wouldn't be so quick to view them as sweet little bundles of joy, but more like evil little bundles of depravity.  Maybe they wouldn't be so quick to praise the Lord for that...
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Is God Only Concerned about His Glory and Being Famous?

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In a couple posts I wrote ( "Are We Only Here For God's Glory?  What About God's Love?" and "Calvinists, Altar Calls, and Evangelism" ), I looked at my Calvi-pastor's ( ex -pastor) reasons for evangelism. He (and maybe Calvinists in general) believes that God's main goal (and basically only goal) is to be famous and to get as much glory as He can for Himself. T his pastor reminds us often about God's glory being His biggest concern.  And he wrote an article about "making God famous" being the main goal of evangelism, instead of something more like "sharing God's love and forgiveness with people, helping them find healing and hope in Jesus and leading them into a personal relationship with Him."  (Yes, he does believe in calling people to repent, but he doesn't do altar calls or ask people if they want to accept Jesus as Lord and Savior, if they want to have a personal relationship with Jesus.  Challenging people ...
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List of Calvinist Preachers, Authors, Theologians, Websites, etc.

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I  found a lot more names to add to my list of known Calvinists (found in my various  "How to Tell if a Church, Pastor, or Website is Calvinist"  posts).  But instead of adding this huge list to all those posts, I am going to put it here, and I'll just provide a link on those posts to this one.  [FYI: I added a note at the bottom of this post on May 5, 2021.] So here it is, a "master list" of known Calvinists to help you be careful and discerning about who you listen to and where you get your theology from.  There are plenty more Calvinists out there, but these are just the names that I ran across the most.   These are either definite, self-professed Calvinists or "most likely Calvinist," in my estimation.  (I haven't heard of most of them, but it's good to know their theology before I do.)   After finding these names in various places online, I looked up each person to see if they are Calvinist.  If they did not self-identify ...
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Enjoying Some Priscilla Shirer Videos

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Since we are not going to our church anymore because of its recent slide into Calvinism, I am needing to find good, godly Christian speakers online to get my "church" from.  For now.  And my go-to preacher is, of course, Tony Evans.  But to mix it up a little, I have recently been watching his daughter speak, Priscilla Shirer.  And she's good.  Really good.  (I also love the movie she's in, War Room .  It really does make you want to take prayer more seriously.) Over the past couple days, I watched these three videos by Priscilla Shirer.  And I thought I'd share the links here, in case you are looking for a little practical encouragement too. Acting In Obedience The Armor   [I'll admit, though, that while I totally understand the need for and importance of prayer, I'm still really struggling with it.  After having so many prayers and expectations fail, so many times I've gotten my hopes up about something only to severely cra...
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When Forgiveness is Hard

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(This is a continuation of point #10 in "Getting through the 'broken' times." )  10.   Forgive.             Going through painful trials often gives us tunnel-vision.   All we see is how everyone else is treating us wrong and how life is being unfair.   And we make the pain worse by dwelling on all the ways we’ve been cheated in life.   We catalog our hurts, the ways people let us down, the ways they treated us poorly, the ways God let us down, etc.   And we grow bitter and more discouraged and more closed-off.                 Bitterness is a poison.   And it will slowly destroy our relationship with others, our faith, our emotional health, and our physical well-being.   Good never comes from carrying around giant chains of unforgiveness and bitterness.   It only weighs us down, making our futures as pathetic as...
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And Yet Again - 21 More Anti-Calvinism Memes

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I giggle making these.  Helps me blow off steam. Only if you're elected ... So you're a Calvinist? Except for you ... "I love being a Calvinist" First I'll tell them ... Said Jesus Never! We Calvinists say ... The bookcase Researching John Calvin Snap Out Of It The Pro-Calvinism Meme Absolutely Sure ... Calvinist Lunatic If you want people ... Another Predestination Sermon It's called "Calvinism" Lucky Dude "All" Means "Some" God "In Control" "Total depravity" (AKA "Total Inability" - a concept NOT found in the Bible anywhere!) It's be...
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Isn't that how life goes sometimes!

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Three weeks ago, I found a hummingbird live-cam online - https://www.bellahummingbird.com/ .  The same day I found it, the hummingbird mama - Bella - laid her first egg of the season.  And then a second.   And I thought, "How cool!  I get to see these babies from the very start."   Eager to see the babies hatch, I checked on the live-cam every couple days.  And then, just a few days ago, the first baby hatched, followed shortly by the second. Two tiny new baby hummingbirds.  I called my boys over to show them off.   I guess this camera has been running since 2013.  It's been going for 6 years, but this is the first time I noticed it.  And I was excited about checking on the baby birds every day, watching them grow. What an honor! And then yesterday ... three weeks after I started watching the hummingbird live-cam that I missed for the last 6 years ... the mama bird was possibly killed, they suspect by a praying mantis (???),...
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What Kind Of Christian Are You? 12-ish Different Kinds of "Christian"

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I find it very disheartening to read people’s opinions of Christians nowadays.   Society is coming down on them really hard, with such hateful force.   It almost makes me wonder what kind of Christian they are talking about.   While they might not differentiate one Christian from another, I think there are various different kinds of Christians (and “Christians”).   And just for fun, I want to make a list of as many different kinds I can think of.   And I am putting it on this blog because it’s important for the world to understand what a genuine Christian is and isn’t.   So here goes, in no particular order   (And these are not exclusive of each other.   There can be some overlap.   Nor is this an exhaustive or “official” list.) …
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Giggle Translate #11: Praying Mantises (A.K.A. Prayer Helicopters)

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Here is my new Giggle Translate.  I ran a post I wrote about hatching praying mantises through many different languages with Google Translate, and here is how it came out: Original paragraph: Several years back, I bought some praying mantis egg cases to put in my garden.    But we wanted to watch them hatch (and raise one in a tank on our counter), and so we kept the egg cases in the kitchen suspended from a stick over a bowl.    For weeks they did nothing.    They just sat there, like dried-up walnuts.    I was beginning to wonder if we had a couple of duds.
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