Conversations with a Calvinist (memes, updated)

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(all memes made at imgflip)

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White horses and a cup of tea (part 3)

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[I'm working my way through this slowly.  Click here for part 1 and part 2 of this series.]  First, here's The White Horse Parable again (my version): A man and his son owned a field that they farmed for a living.  And one day, they found a white horse in the field. "Oh, what a blessing," said the farmer.  "A free horse." But then the horse started tearing up their plants.   "Oh, this is terrible.  What a curse!" cried the farmer.   But then they caught the horse and tamed it and were able to use it to farm the field. "Oh, what a blessing," said the farmer. But then the son was thrown off the horse, broke both arms, and couldn't farm for months, reducing their sales and income. "Oh, what a curse," said the farmer. "I wish this horse never came to us.  Why, God?  Why!?!" But then a war started, and the army issued a draft.  But because the son had broken arms, he was excused from the draft and didn't have to f...
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Updated: Alana L. 5K "sovereign"

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[I redid Point #5 and #6 in the Alana L. series on my other blog (and re-lettered the posts).  But instead of going back and changing the already-posted points on this blog, I'll just add the posts in their own little "series."  Some of this stuff is in the already-published posts on this blog, but a lot is new and/or changed.  FYI: I've already got the posts in this series preset to be published every other week up into late 2026.  So there will be a long series of posts about Calvinism coming up, but with some non-series/non-Calvinism posts thrown in now and then for variety or fun.]   Point #5:  K : "Sovereign, sovereign, sovereign, sovereign."     Hahaha, Alana nailed this one!   And as she said,  "What many new Calvinists don't understand, and what they'll learn little by little by little - because if they were told this in the beginning they probably would catch on a little too quick and not follow the path  [Bi...
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In "Honor" of Halloween: My Story of Demonic Harassment (repost)

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(Reposted from last year and retold in various other posts.  I may just repost this one yearly at this time of year.) In “honor” of Halloween (a day that deserves no honor), I’m gonna share with you why we don’t celebrate Halloween.   (We take our kids to a movie instead, or buy a movie they’ve been wanting and have a “family movie night” with candy and popcorn.   So no need to feel sorry for them; they are not deprived.)   I don’t expect anyone to believe me, but I’m going to share my story.    (And for the longer version of this story on my other blog, click here .)  It’s my story about how I came to fully trust in Jesus’s name and to passionately cling to Him, to never be able to doubt the existence of a spirit world, to place such a high priority on prayer and God’s Word, and to always remember my need for spiritual armor.   And once again, you don’t have to believe me.   (But don’t say I never warned you.   And if you are ...
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My Panic Attack (repost)

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(Reposted from my blog, https://myimpressionisticlife.blogspot.com , from 2016.   A really bad year for me.) I wrote this in the post called “Random Facts about Me.  Just for Fun!” on my other blog.  It’s #64 on the list.  But I think it deserves its own post.  So I am reposting it here, because it fits with the theme of this blog.   If you’ve ever had a panic attack, maybe you can relate.  I hope not, though.  Because panic attacks suck!             64.   I had a small panic attack three days ago (May 30, 2016).  It’s the first one I’ve ever had and I don’t plan on ever having another one.  [I also once had a minor nervous breakdown during my parents’ very messy divorce.  It was so bad that the only way I could start breathing and stop crying was to flee from everything, to jump in the car with my husband and two kids and run away to the middle of nowhere for a little while.]
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Little Drummer Boy #1

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My all-time favorite classic Christmas song has got to be the Little Drummer Boy.   If I’m listening to this song and start to think too much about it, I start to well up with tears.  Every time. My sons occasionally ask me why this is my favorite Christmas song.   “It’s stupid and it doesn’t make sense,” they say. I answer like this: “This song is about a little boy who’s poor.  And he wants to bring Jesus a gift.  But he doesn’t have anything to give him.  And so he gives the baby Jesus the only gift he has to give – a song.  And this poor boy is drumming his little heart out for the Lord, because that’s all he has to give.  But it’s enough.  And the baby Jesus smiles.” Usually, I am trying to hold back tears as I share this with my sons.  But they simply reply that it's still stupid, before running off to play. But that’s okay. I don’t expect them to get it yet.   And in some ways, I almost hope t...
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Giggle Translate #10: Whispers, Tired Cabbage, and North Korea

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Here is the original section I wrote for   my life story   over at my other blog: I am also a Licensed Professional Counselor with a Master’s degree in Counseling Psychology.  But that sounds more impressive than it really is, because I actually have very little counseling experience. And my first “attempt” at it wasn’t very impressive, either.  My very first counseling job was, of course, as an intern.  I was supposed to sit in with my supervisor as he counseled a reluctant teen boy.  And I was hugely pregnant with my first child. Before going into the counseling room, I was passing through the office when a bowl of butterscotch candies called out to me,  “Heather, you want one of us!  We look good, don’t we?  Go ahead, take one!  The baby wants butterscotch!”   A little voice in my head said,  “Don’t do it.”   But did I listen?  No!  I grabbed a piece and popped it in my mouth.  After all, I was just ...
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As evil as it gets: Calvinism on babies and the unreached

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[A.k.a: Snippets to Ponder, part 4 (#20-21).  This is such a long "snippet" - too many horrific quotes, couldn't resist adding them - that I decided to just make it a whole post.  (I might eventually break this up into smaller posts.)  Topics in this post: Calvinism, babies, and unreached people. Click here for snippets  part 1 ,  part 2 , and  part 3  on my other blog.] #20:   Calvinist comments about babies   [ buckle up, hang on tight, and have a barf-bag ready] : About the suffering and abuse of babies and children:   [ And remember that these are not my words.  These are Calvinist's  own words , and so you can see that we are not misrepresenting them or putting words in their mouths.  This is hard stuff to read.  Really hard.  But you need to read it.  To know that they really do teach this garbage.  (And "garbage" is the nice word.  I was gonna use a stronger one.  Oh, yes, I was!...
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Starting the new school year with Creation vs. Evolution

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I'm not starting this blog up again, but I did want to add this post from my other blog (the one I still occasionally add posts to: Heather's Garden and Home ) because it very much has to do with faith, which is what My Crazy Faith is all about.  I don't know about you, but I could use a little boost to encourage and strengthen my faith, considering what a hopeless mess this world is right now.  So here it is ... If there's one thing I would go back and change if I could when homeschooling my older two children (grown and graduated now), it would be that I would have them watch more great educational videos online, instead of focusing mostly on textbooks.   (And I would let them have more time to pursue something they were passionate about.  I'd rather have a kid who was passionate about something, anything - studying bugs, piano, building, classical literature, writing stories, etc. - than have a kid who did all the boring bookwork but never developed a passion...
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Another Serving of Anti-Calvinism Memes

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Some more of the memes I made up, just for fun! "Sovereignty" ... Special code Working for salvation? "Total Inability" But guess what? And so I said ... I told you ... WRONG! Santa Claus Hard To Swallow Pills How you feel when ... The Pie Chart - Theological Influences The Pie Chart - Calvinist Theology Calvinist theology - dead men I Tell You This Every Time ... Definitely "elected" How do we get them to believe ... Where do you get your theology from? You're right, Calvinist A Calvinist's Amazing Grace What if ...?
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Spiritual Warfare: Sword of the Spirit 2 (the bedrock)

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It was hard to watch my family member struggle through her deep emotional pain (see previous post ), and I couldn't really do anything to stop her difficult trial or make it all better for her, especially since the battle was mostly in her head.  And I know what that's like: Anxiety is a bully who doesn't play by the rules.  Unfair, unruly, and aggressive.  Running roughshod over you, your mind, your life. I couldn't fix it for her because she was in a battle she was forced to fight herself.  But I could at least try to encourage her by letting her know that I understood, that I got through something similar and that I know she can too... but that she has to want to get through it, to fight it and not give in.  She has to refuse to succumb to the Enemy's lies and destructive tactics. And to help her do this, I shared with her one of the things that helped me get through my hardest times: My "sword of the Spirit," my own personal list of favorite verses tha...
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