To Those Raising Gender-Neutral Kids

(And to a society who's insisting on raising a gender-neural generation:)

Are you not concerned that it may hurt your child's self-esteem and sexuality and sense of self to tell them that their gender doesn't matter?  That this very intimate, important part of them isn't real?

You might think you're helping your child feel "free," but what you're really doing by denying a very key part of them is making them feel ashamed of their boy-ness or girl-ness.

You know what ... I have four children who were born with penises.  And do you know what we raised them to believe?  That they are boys.   

Insane?  Or scientific fact and common-freakin'-sense!?!

Frankly, I'm proud of my boys.  I'm happy to have boys, to celebrate their maleness, to make them feel like they're perfect just the way they are.  (If I had girls, I would celebrate their femaleness.) 

It's too bad that others don't do that for their children!

I'm celebrating my kids for who they are. 

You're celebrating yours for not being who they are.

Don't you see how ludicrous, backwards, and damaging that is!

Kids who are raised gender-neutral will, of course, act gender-neutral.  

But is it because they genuinely are gender-neutral or undecided?  (That's a very small percentage.) 

No!  It's because mommy or daddy taught them that it's what they wanted their children to be.  And of course, children want to please their parents.  They want to be celebrated and praised.  And so if being gender-neutral or gender-confused or trans-gender gets mommy or daddy to celebrate them or to praise them, then of course that's how they will act. 

Sadly, though, they won't realize until they're older that they weren't celebrated for who they really are, that they were robbed of the delights of being the boy or girl that they are ... and that their parents were really just living through them, using them to be part of a social movement and to appear "progressive" and "hip."   

Way to go!  I hope it's worth the damage it will do to your child's self-esteem, childhood joy, and sexuality!

(reposted from Heather's Garden and Home)