A Weekly Dose of Satire

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I love satire.  Always have.  Here are some good pieces I just found:

 Miraculous: Clump of Cells Transforms into Fully-Formed Baby Upon Womb Exit  (This has happened to me four times!  It's amazing!  Caused my doctor to shout out in surprise: "Oh my goodness!  A huge chunk of your body just fell out of you!")


Nation's Christians Shocked That Popular CCM Artist Doesn't Have Robust Theology


 In Upcoming Reboot, Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer To Sue Santa Claus For Discrimination


Veggie Tales Producers Apologize For Episode Where Larry The Cucumber Joins The KKK


Woke Parents Refuse To Assume Newborn Baby's Nutrition Preferences


Hollywood Working On Official List Of Comedians It's OK To Laugh At  (Always great to have more "thought police" and "social justice warriors" working for us, making the world a better place!)


Most Popular Posts of the Week:

Feminism Nonsense (repost)

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(Oh, how we love nonsense in our country!) We women are fighting so hard to be like men, to downplay femininity, to be perceived as more masculine, to overtake any "men's realm" we find.   Because it’s “cool” and “progressive” and “strong.” But do we not realize that we are not “leveling the playing field” so much as we are destroying ourselves , the things that make women special? Women can be strong, too.   And they don’t have to be like men to do it.   Trust me, I know.  I've had four children, one by c-section and three by natural, drug-free homebirth (with over 15 hours of labor for each one).  And then I work in the home every day, all day long.  No pay.  No vacation time.  No weekends off.  No bonuses.  No overtime pay. But I do it because my family and I value my position, my role.  Even if the world doesn't. W e women can be strong and capable and accomplished in our...
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Is God Drawing Lines in the Sand (repost)

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(R eposted from a few years ago, updated slightly.  Part of the "End Times" series.) It’s amazing and disturbing how brazen our society is in attacking everything about God and everything He created:  marriage, monogamy, sex, family, sexuality, the scientific reality of gender, morality, modesty, the value of a person, the right to life, the existence of "right and wrong," the Bible, Jesus, and Absolute Truth.  Not to mention God Himself, His very existence. We are destroying everything associated with Him (except nature – we worship that), and then we call ourselves "progressive." But you know what I think about it all?   I think that God is letting it happen because He is drawing lines in the sand.  Through all these divisive issues and all the immorality, God is saying “Pick a side!  I am forcing you to decide which side you want to be on ... because I am coming back soon to take My people out of here.  So I need you all to decide: ...
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Be Wary Of The Christian Post

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(Written 6/15/18)  Occasionally, I check in with the Christian Post to see what's going on in the world that specifically relates to Christians.  And generally, I've never really had any red flags go up about this website ... until now. A recent article by Stoyan Zaimov, with a title that starts "Christian Lesbian rock star ..." goes on to share this woman's story about being assaulted by a male priest when she was young.   However, I don't think the reason for this article is to talk about the abuse she suffered and her courage in speaking up.  I think this is a deliberate attempt to affirm Christian homosexuality.  The very fact that they put "Christian" and "lesbian" in the title makes it sound like it's indeed possible to be a Christian and a practicing homosexual who sees no need to change. And it seems to me that this article paints her in a heroic light, as though she is in the right and should be applauded and e...
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List of Calvinist Preachers, Authors, Theologians, Websites, etc.

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I  found a lot more names to add to my list of known Calvinists (found in my various  "How to Tell if a Church, Pastor, or Website is Calvinist"  posts).  But instead of adding this huge list to all those posts, I am going to put it here, and I'll just provide a link on those posts to this one.  [FYI: I added a note at the bottom of this post on May 5, 2021.] So here it is, a "master list" of known Calvinists to help you be careful and discerning about who you listen to and where you get your theology from.  There are plenty more Calvinists out there, but these are just the names that I ran across the most.   These are either definite, self-professed Calvinists or "most likely Calvinist," in my estimation.  (I haven't heard of most of them, but it's good to know their theology before I do.)   After finding these names in various places online, I looked up each person to see if they are Calvinist.  If they did not self-identify ...
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Praying Scripture: When Anxiety Strikes

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          Prayer for when Anxiety Strikes             Psalm 55:22:   “Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous fall.”             Philippians 4:6-7:   “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.   And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.”             John 14:27:   “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you.   I do not give to you as the world gives.   Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”             Lord, You say that we can present to You all of our concerns and needs. ...
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Giggle Translate #1: Random Facts About Me (Skydiving, Flashlights, and I'm a WHAT!?!)

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I'm bored.  So I've been running some paragraphs I've written through a bunch of randomly-chosen languages in a row with Google Translate and then back into English, just for giggles.  (I'm not serious, uptight, and a deep-thinker all the time.)  It's like a funny, terrible game of "Telephone."  (FYI: Bad word ahead.  Not my fault.  Blame Google Translate.  But I did bleep out a couple letters.)   Here are a few of the first ones I've done so far (the original writing was taken from my post  "Random Facts About Me, Just For Fun" ):
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War Rooms, Praying Scripture, and Spiritual Warfare (repost)

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I strongly believe that there are angels and demons.  That prayer matters.  That there is a spiritual battle going on around us all the time ... and that we need to get involved in it, actively and consciously.  (Something I haven't been doing lately.)   Regardless of if we want it or not, we are constantly facing spiritual battles.  But if we don't acknowledge it - if we stick our heads in the sand, refuse to get involved, fail to put on our spiritual armor or to use the spiritual weapons available to us - we open ourselves up to deceptions, to defeat, to being very vulnerable to the strategies and attacks of the evil one.  You can't win a battle you don't even know you're in.  You can't defeat an enemy you pretend isn't there. What I have done here is compile a list of posts on spiritual warfare, on praying Scripture, and on creating a War Room (or War Journal). Have you ever seen  War Room ? You should.  It's a great movie.  And it is...
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Giggle Translate #8: Lockdown and The Wiggles

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I wrote this the other day as I thought about the effect staying home too long can have on your family.  And then I ran it through a bunch of languages with Google Translate to see what happened.  Here it is: Original post: You know this “lockdown new normal” is starting to get to everyone when these things start happening:
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"Without You"

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For King and Country is fast becoming a favorite band of mine.  They have such beautiful music and such meaningful lyrics. I just found this song ... "Without You." It came out of a time of serious physical sickness, from wanting to not die, wanting to be able to stay with those you love.  But I think the deeper meaning is not wanting to lose God, even when we are struggling with our deepest aches and trials.  It's about choosing to cling fiercely to Him, being brought to our knees in humility, even when everything is bad.  It's about saying, "No matter what, I won't leave You."  I know how that feels.  In 2016, I went through my worst year ever .  I got to a point where I didn't want to wake up in the morning because paralyzing panic flooded my mind the moment I woke up, and depression enveloped me the rest of the day.  Where I couldn't pray anything but "Please, come back, Jesus.  Just come back now and end it all."  Where I wan...
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"My Corona Blend": An Essential Oil Blend for Diffusers

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(Great, now I'll be singing "My Sharona" all day!) This is an essential oil blend I made to put in our diffusers at night while we are facing this coronavirus pandemic.  I picked oils that are known for their powerful anti-viral properties, that are good against colds/flu/fever/infectious diseases, that are good for lung/respiratory health, and that help stimulate the immune system.  (I call it "My Corona Blend" for my own reference, but I make no promises about its ability to defeat the Coronavirus.) The smell of oregano and thyme really come through in this.  It smells a bit strong, but pleasant, like a lemon thyme herb plant.  If you want a less oregano/thyme smell, add about half of both of those oils. (Check out safety recommendations for each essential oil to see if they are safe in a diffuser for your family, depending on the age of everyone in your house and whether they have compromised immune systems or not.  And then adjust accordingly, a...
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