A Weekly Dose of Satire

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I love satire.  Always have.  Here are some good pieces I just found:

 Miraculous: Clump of Cells Transforms into Fully-Formed Baby Upon Womb Exit  (This has happened to me four times!  It's amazing!  Caused my doctor to shout out in surprise: "Oh my goodness!  A huge chunk of your body just fell out of you!")


Nation's Christians Shocked That Popular CCM Artist Doesn't Have Robust Theology


 In Upcoming Reboot, Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer To Sue Santa Claus For Discrimination


Veggie Tales Producers Apologize For Episode Where Larry The Cucumber Joins The KKK


Woke Parents Refuse To Assume Newborn Baby's Nutrition Preferences


Hollywood Working On Official List Of Comedians It's OK To Laugh At  (Always great to have more "thought police" and "social justice warriors" working for us, making the world a better place!)


Most Popular Posts of the Week:

Scariest Halloween decoration ever?

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So it's Halloween time again, huh?  Is it just me, or has there been a big increase in the amount of Halloween decorations in people's yards? I don't decorate for Halloween, nothing more than maybe a few pumpkins.  But a neighbor and I were talking the other day, and she inadvertently stumbled on what I think would make the best Halloween decoration.  Something truly terrifying.  And if I had more guts, I'd maybe consider doing it someday. She was reading out loud some reported quotes from famous atheists just before their death, and I thought Now that would make a scary Halloween display in your yard, a collection of tombstones with atheist quotes on them!    Quotes such as these: David Strauss , who spread German rationalism to erase people's belief in God: "My philosophy leaves me utterly forlorn!  I feel like one caught in the merciless jaws of an automatic machine, not knowing at what time one of its great hammers may crush me!" Thomas Paine , atheis
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More "American Noise"

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A Skillet CD (yes, I still listen to and prefer Cd's.  I'm that old!) is in the player of our van right now.  And because I hate switching CD's if I don't have to, sorting through dozens of them, trying to find one I'm in the mood for... I leave the Skillet one in the player and just keep listening to the same song over and over again (with a few other songs thrown in too): American Noise.   I really like this song. Anyway, it made me think of the post I wrote about it 5 1/2 years ago now (wow, time flies!).  And after re-reading that post, I decided to print it again, because it stills fits.  In fact, there's even more noise in America now - in the world - than there was then.  (Anyone else getting sick of it all too?) So here it is, the previous post on it: I was driving the other day, and this song began playing from a CD my husband had in the CD player.  I had never heard it before, but for some reason, it struck me.  I don't know why, but it did.  It s
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How to Tell if a Church, Pastor, or Website is Calvinist (simplified version)

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(For the extended version of this post, which I recommend, click here .  It is loaded with lots more information.  This simplified one is just the highlights.  And feel free to copy this and share it with others, to help them learn to identify Calvinism when they see it.  Just make sure to share the link to this post so that they can find the original one if they want it.  Thank you.   New :  For the super-short version,   click here .   And FYI:  I found a couple times when the Calvinist author of an article I linked to changed the article after I linked to it.  So if an article doesn't seem to match what I said about it, it may be because they altered it. ) We just left our church of almost 20 years because of the dogmatic Calvinist pastor who recently came on board.  ( Read my "Letter to Our Elders Regarding Calvinism Growing in Our Church" here.)   And I was thinking about what precautions I might take to make sure we didn't end up in another Calvinist church
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In "Honor" of Halloween: My Story of Demonic Harassment (repost)

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(Reposted from last year and retold in various other posts.  I may just repost this one yearly at this time of year.) In “honor” of Halloween (a day that deserves no honor), I’m gonna share with you why we don’t celebrate Halloween.   (We take our kids to a movie instead, or buy a movie they’ve been wanting and have a “family movie night” with candy and popcorn.   So no need to feel sorry for them; they are not deprived.)   I don’t expect anyone to believe me, but I’m going to share my story.    (And for the longer version of this story on my other blog, click here .)  It’s my story about how I came to fully trust in Jesus’s name and to passionately cling to Him, to never be able to doubt the existence of a spirit world, to place such a high priority on prayer and God’s Word, and to always remember my need for spiritual armor.   And once again, you don’t have to believe me.   (But don’t say I never warned you.   And if you are a skeptic and get nothing from this whole section, jus
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Calvinism doesn't rescue anyone

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Calvinism doesn’t rescue any sinner from hell.  Because the elect were never on their way to hell, never at risk of going to hell at any point in time ... and the non-elect can never be rescued from hell because Calvi-Jesus never died for them and because Calvi-god made it impossible for them to believe. All Calvinism does is convince some people that they’ve always been saved without ever having to do anything about it, not even choosing to believe in Jesus (because in Calvinism, we  can't  choose to believe), while convincing others that they can never be saved, that God doesn’t love them, that Jesus didn’t die for them, and that there’s no hope for them. A lie from the pit of hell.  Destroying the evangelical church from the inside out.  And it will cost people their souls. [A comment I left on the Soteriology 101 post  "(Re)Thinking through Romans 9" , with a few small alterations.  And of course, not all Calvinists will word things this way.  They will try to soften
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"The Last Goodbye" - A song for us Hobbits

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(a post from my other blog , from March 28, 2022) There's a song at the end of  The Battle of the Five Armies  (from the Hobbit trilogy) that's become one of my favorite songs.  I feel this song, especially the line about "Many places I have been, many sorrows I have seen..."  That's kinda been my last several years: many sorrows I have seen.   Many trials.  Many heartbreaks.  (Everyone who lives long enough will have many of these.) Most recently, I had the awful experience of being on the witness stand for three hours, giving testimony against my mom.  And after nearly a week of trial, she was found guilty of ... well, of something really bad.  (She insists she didn't do it, but we think otherwise.  It's not exactly like the prosecution says, but close enough.)  And now she will spend her life in prison.   Many sorrows I have seen. I don't know if I'll ever see her again.  The last memory I have of her could very well be her sitting in the courtr
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The Bible vs. Calvinism: An Overview by Patrick Myers (a great resource)

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 A friend of mine recently sent me a link to an article that she says is one of the best overviews of Calvinism and its errors that she's read.  And after reading it, I agree.  I think it's a great one to share with others because it's got all the basics in one place: The Bible vs. Calvinism: An Overview by Patrick Myers There are some great rebuttals to Calvinist proof-texts in here, and some eye-opening quotes from Calvinists.  Something like this might help Calvinists understand what their theology  really  teaches and what the Bible  really  teaches - and that these aren't saying the same thing.   FYI: If you click on the "about/contact" link at the bottom of the article, you can send him an email to request a PDF copy of his article.   And after I contacted him by email to tell him how much I appreciated his article, he graciously put a link to my anti-Calvinism blog at the bottom.  Thank you, Patrick, that was very kind of you. 😊
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List of Calvinist Preachers, Authors, Theologians, Websites, etc.

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I  found a lot more names to add to my list of known Calvinists (found in my various  "How to Tell if a Church, Pastor, or Website is Calvinist"  posts).  But instead of adding this huge list to all those posts, I am going to put it here, and I'll just provide a link on those posts to this one.  [FYI: I added a note at the bottom of this post on May 5, 2021.] So here it is, a "master list" of known Calvinists to help you be careful and discerning about who you listen to and where you get your theology from.  There are plenty more Calvinists out there, but these are just the names that I ran across the most.   These are either definite, self-professed Calvinists or "most likely Calvinist," in my estimation.  (I haven't heard of most of them, but it's good to know their theology before I do.)   After finding these names in various places online, I looked up each person to see if they are Calvinist.  If they did not self-identify as a Calvinist, I
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I vote for ...

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Here in America, it's election day again.  And I think we can all agree that it's a super-emotional, super-heated, super-critical election this time around.  Everyone's fighting over it.  Everyone's demonizing the other side.  Everyone's absolutely certain that their candidate must get in or else the country's going to go to hell-in-a-handbasket.  (Actually, I bet we're all thinking it's going to hell-in-a-handbasket anyway, no matter who gets into office.) And as I walk around the neighborhood every day on my prayer-walks, I see all the political signs in people's yards:  Harris!  Trump!  Vote for love and truth!  Don't vote for hate!  Make America great again!  Take back America!  Blah, blah, blah. But in all the political noise, I saw one sign that I could totally get behind, just one : Jesus 2024 - Our only hope!     Can I get an "Amen"!?!   Of course, I have an opinion of who I'd like to see in office, and I say my prayers abou
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"I have no clue what you're talking about."

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The other day, I told my sons that if they can't find the official "doggie bags," they can use plastic grocery-store bags (we have an over-abundance of them) to clean up after our dog on walks.   In response, my 13-year-old son delighted to inform me that "Mom, if you use a Walmart bag to clean up dog poop on the side of the road, you'll look like a crazy lady.  Especially with the kind of hair you have." Me:
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