Things My Calvinist Pastor Said #1: We Can't Choose

(This "Things My Calvinist Pastor Said" series is a breakdown on this much longer post: "We Left Our Church Because of Calvinism," which was written in 2019 but updated July 2020 and again in late 2025.  All memes were created with imgflip.)

The inevitable has finally happened, the day we hoped would never come: The day we officially resigned from our church because of our pastor's dogmatic Calvinist preaching (May 20, 2019).  (From now on, I will try to call him our "ex-pastor."  And for the record, it was an Evangelical Free Church, which are being taken over by Calvinism all over the place.  So be wary and educated.)

It's been a long road.  He came on board about 6 years ago, and began introducing his Calvinist views here and there.  Just a little bit at a time, never really exposing the ugly parts of Calvinism.  Just subtle points that didn't really alarm us.  (If I had known then what I know now, I would've recognized the Calvinism much earlier and more easily.  But we don't know what we don't know, which is how they get many of us.)  

And he's not a mean guy or bad guy or anything.  He seems nice enough (😕) and like he does want to honor God.  And he's got a good "leader-type" personality: strong, confident, bold, well-educated... 

... authoritarian, controlling, domineering in a "this is my church; my ways are best; I always know best; everyone should want to be like me; no one can disagree with me" way.  

But at first, he just seemed bold and enthusiastic, a good strong leader.   

But then a little over a year after starting his pastor-ship, he did a 9-month long series on Romans.  (Calvinists love digging into Romans because they think it proves Calvinism.  And so if you don't understand Romans 9 correctly, they will talk you into Calvinism!)  

And this is when he began pulling out the Calvinist Big Guns.  And it's only gotten worse from there.  Personally, I think he did a 9-month long series on Romans simply so that he could talk about predestination for 9 long months!  It is clearly one of his favorite topics.  And since then, our "alarm bells" have been going off continuously.  

(But he's still been very careful to almost never mention the word "Calvinist," or to identify himself as such.  And it's been over 7 years since he came on board as of July 2020, and he has only just now done a blog post on TULIP for the first time, as far as I can tell.  That's how long Calvinists will lay the groundwork and carefully entrench the church in their theology before exposing it for what it is.  See my post "The 9 Marks of a Calvinist Cult.")   

This long post is about the things that he has said (or that his adult son has said, a son who is CREEPY when he preaches, staring down the congregation, pointing his finger at us as he sternly lectures us, even though he's probably only in his 30's).  

These are the kinds of things that caused my family to eventually leave that church, even thought we'd been there 20 years and raised our kids there.  The intro statements in red for each point aren't actual quotes, but basically yeah (find exact quotes here: When Calvinists say "But predestination!" (sermons)):

1.  "We don't 'choose' God or obedience.  We are so depraved, so wicked, that we can't choose God or seek God.  God chooses us and has to cause us to seek Him!" 

 
Interesting, because ... 

            

1 Chronicles 22:19: "Now devote your heart and soul to seeking the Lord your God." 

Joshua 24:15: "But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve ..."  

Psalm 119:30: "But I have chosen the way of truth..."  

Psalm 119:173: "May your hand be ready to help me, for I have chosen your precepts."  

Joel 3:14: "Multitudes, multitudes in the valley of decision!"  

John 7:17: "If anyone chooses to do God's will ..."  

Deuteronomy 4:29: "But if from there you seek the Lord your God, you will find him if you look for him with all your heart and with all your soul." 

Jeremiah 29:13: "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart..."

Acts 17:27: "For God did this so that men would seek him and perhaps reach out for him and find him..."

Psalm 14:2: "The Lord looks down from heaven on the sons of men to see if there are any who understand, any who seek God."

Hebrews 11:6: "... anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him."

Isaiah 55:6: "Seek the Lord while he may be found ..."

Amos 5:4, 14: "Seek me and live ... Seek good, not evil."

Proverbs 8:17: "... those who seek me find me."

Jeremiah 50:4: "... the people of Israel and the people of Judah together will go in tears to seek the Lord their God."

Yep, no "choosing" or "seeking" in the Bible anywhere! 

Calvinists believe that "total depravity" means we are unable to want God or seek God or believe in God unless He makes us do it.  And, of course, He'll only make the Calv-elect do it.

And they use the verse "no one seeks God" (Romans 3:11) to try to prove it, saying "See, no one can seek God unless God makes them do it."

But nowhere in that section does it say people cannot seek God, just that they don't.  Romans 3:10-18 is taken from Psalms about wicked people who reject God and choose to be wicked.  And Psalm 10:4 says it too: "In his pride the wicked does not seek him; in all his thoughts there is no room for God."  Even Romans 3:12 says "All have turned away..."  

This is why they do not seek God or understand - because they've chosen their wickedness over God, because they've turned away from Him and said "there is no God"... not because God created us to be unable to seek/believe in Him or because He prevents non-Calv-elect people from seeking/believing in Him.  Ridiculous.  Blasphemous.  [See "TULIP's Totally-Depraved Doctrine"]