Giggle Translate #14: Stupid Chipmunk!
I took my "Stupid Chipmunk" post and ran it through Google Translate a lot of different times to see what happened.
Original Post:
If there's a chipmunk that sits five feet outside your dining room window every morning (where you like to sit in the quiet of the morning with your coffee and Bible, enjoying a few moments of peace before the day gets going) ... and this chipmunk chirps shrill-ly and loudly every 3 seconds for hours on end ... and you want to scare it off by throwing something at it ... let me tell you what NOT to do:
Don't choose to open the window and try to throw a cardboard box at it to scare it off, when you could just walk thirty feet around to your outside deck where you could throw a bucket of water on it.
I opened the stupid window two weeks ago to throw a box at it because I was too lazy to walk around onto the deck ... and I swung as hard as I could (because cardboard doesn't fly very far) ... and instead of throwing the cardboard out the window towards the chipmunk, I smashed my hand full force into the wooden windowsill! First thing in the morning. Before I even had my coffee.
It's been aching for two weeks, and I have a hard time using/bending that finger now. Even washing dishes is difficult because it hurts my knuckle as I try to twist a rag around inside of a cup to clean it, and it hurts to try to untwist the drain-plug at the bottom of the sink.
Stupid chipmunk!
And now the translated version:
[Okay, all I can think of when I hear "rival walnuts" is a bunch of walnuts facing off against each other on a table, snapping their fingers and singing "When you're a jet, you're a jet all the way ...", West Side Story-style. And Bible coffee? Where can I get a cup of that? And where exactly is my hurting "oil"? I don't remember learning about that part in biology class.]
Original Post:
If there's a chipmunk that sits five feet outside your dining room window every morning (where you like to sit in the quiet of the morning with your coffee and Bible, enjoying a few moments of peace before the day gets going) ... and this chipmunk chirps shrill-ly and loudly every 3 seconds for hours on end ... and you want to scare it off by throwing something at it ... let me tell you what NOT to do:
Don't choose to open the window and try to throw a cardboard box at it to scare it off, when you could just walk thirty feet around to your outside deck where you could throw a bucket of water on it.
I opened the stupid window two weeks ago to throw a box at it because I was too lazy to walk around onto the deck ... and I swung as hard as I could (because cardboard doesn't fly very far) ... and instead of throwing the cardboard out the window towards the chipmunk, I smashed my hand full force into the wooden windowsill! First thing in the morning. Before I even had my coffee.
It's been aching for two weeks, and I have a hard time using/bending that finger now. Even washing dishes is difficult because it hurts my knuckle as I try to twist a rag around inside of a cup to clean it, and it hurts to try to untwist the drain-plug at the bottom of the sink.
Stupid chipmunk!
And now the translated version:
When there are five rival walnuts on the dining table (if you drink bible coffee in the morning and enjoy the peace), you cry every 3 seconds ... and if you want to get rid of the fear ... What will I tell you:
Don't open the window and try to throw a cartoon to scare you if you can walk 10 meters up your path where you can throw a horn.
Two weeks ago I opened a civilian window and shot the box because I was too lazy not to go to the bridge ... and I was very scared (because the box is not flying) ... and my right hand jumped through the window without putting the box in your science beard! The first morning. I bought coffee first.
He had been sick for two weeks and now I have to use my fingers or bend over. It is very difficult to wash the dishes because my oil hurts, when I tried to change my cup to clean my clothes, and it hurt when I tried to remove the top of the sink.
What an idiot!
Don't open the window and try to throw a cartoon to scare you if you can walk 10 meters up your path where you can throw a horn.
Two weeks ago I opened a civilian window and shot the box because I was too lazy not to go to the bridge ... and I was very scared (because the box is not flying) ... and my right hand jumped through the window without putting the box in your science beard! The first morning. I bought coffee first.
He had been sick for two weeks and now I have to use my fingers or bend over. It is very difficult to wash the dishes because my oil hurts, when I tried to change my cup to clean my clothes, and it hurt when I tried to remove the top of the sink.
What an idiot!
[Okay, all I can think of when I hear "rival walnuts" is a bunch of walnuts facing off against each other on a table, snapping their fingers and singing "When you're a jet, you're a jet all the way ...", West Side Story-style. And Bible coffee? Where can I get a cup of that? And where exactly is my hurting "oil"? I don't remember learning about that part in biology class.]
